12 years ago my mom became very ill pretty much over night. I was only 13 years old, therefore at the time I have not fully understood what was happening. What I did understand was that my world would forever be changed....
It was early in the morning, I want to say between 5 and 6 am, I hadn't left for school yet. My mom woke up in excruciating pain. I was the only one home with her. (My mom and dad divorced when I was one year old.) I remember calling my Grandma, and Ray, my step-father but at that time he and my mom were only dating. They both came to our house immediately! We decided to rush her to the ER. She couldn't even stand to sit, so she rode in the trunk part of our SUV. I vaguely remember her saying she was bleeding while we were on the way, but I had no idea that she was hemorrhaging. When we finally arrived at the hospital she was immediately taken into a room. I remember there being blood everywhere. A nurse was with my Grandma and I trying to get any information that we could give her. The doctor on staff was new and became very dizzy. He kept calling other doctors for help. As I sat in the waiting room my uncle, my mom's twin came in. I remember thinking it was really nice of him to come up, but the truth was he was there in case they needed more blood than they had on hand.
Believe it or not, my mom laid there for hours before help came. They did everything they could do to slow the bleeding, but she bled for hours. After this point, things feel like kind of a blur to me. Maybe I have blocked it out, I don't know....This was some time in late May or early June because I remember not finishing 7th grade in school.
My mom's kidneys began shutting down some time after this. I think it was a few days later. My Gtrandma and I received a phone call around 5 am that we needed to get to the hospital ASAP. After we got there our pastor showed up, and again I thought it was him being supportive for my family, but in reality, doctors thought it was the beginning of the end.We all took turns visiting with her since the ICU was strict about visitors. At some point she was transferred to a different hospital that specialized in her kidney condition. I don't really remember when this took place or exactly why it took place.
I can remember visiting my mom in the ICU of the new hospital and every time I would go into see her, she would throw up. I would become upset and want to go back to the waiting room. In reality my mom's throat was dry from the oxygen, and when she would being to talk it was cause her to choke and throw up. I remember always having this uneasy feeling that wouldn't go away. I couldn't wait to get to the hospital to see her, but when I was finally there I was too nervous to be in the same room with her. I was terrified something would happen to her. We would spend our days, visiting in 30 minute increments.
At the time I wasn't old enough to drive so I had to rely on others to drive me to the hospital. I remember praying nonstop, and I would always say the same prayer in fear that if I didn't she would die. I became very superstitious. I barely slept and my heart would stop every time the phone rang. This was a really difficult time for our family. We were all running on high emotions and low energy which caused many of us to snap at one another.
Eventually the hospital my mom was in decided that she needed to be transported to a higher tech hospital. In our cause this hospital was in Philadelphia, 3 hours from my house. I was terrified. I knew that seeing my mom was going to be next to impossible and I knew if she was being moved things weren't going well.
My Grandma and I packed up and headed to the city of brotherly love. When we arrived we discovered there had been a bed mix up and we were there 3 days before her. ;
I am the daughter of a Lupus patient! This is our journey through my eyes!